Cursed
by Lady Amalthea75
Summary: Tauriel searches for Kili after the battle.


A/N: Watched the trailer for the third movie again today, and got the idea for this. Not even a big fan of this romance, but I felt this needed to be written. Hope you enjoy, please leave feedback.

* * *

Tauriel stood in the midst of a sea of corpses and the wreckage of warfare. The battle had come to an end. There were remnants of the enemy army fleeing, and soldiers giving them chase in the distance. But the far off commotion did nothing to impact the stillness and quiet that had descended on the fallen soldiers around her.

She had seen death before, she had even brought death to her enemies. But she was not used to seeing death to this degree and magnitude. She was an immortal after all, and elves rarely died. She could not remember having seen anyone good die, only orcs and goblins, spiders and other foul creatures, but no one she cared about...not since her parent's deaths. But she had been too small, she did not recall their deaths, or the time she spent alone in the forest before she had been found and brought to live in the realm of King Thranduil. That had been long ago, before Mirkwood was truly full of evil, and before Thranduil had been a creature of such suspicion and disdain.

Her eyes took in the sight of the fallen elves, dwarves and humans. There were even a few eagles laying among the dead, and hundreds of orcs and goblins, with their demonic mounts dead at their sides.

In the end all of these people around her had fought as allies against the orcs and goblins. They had fought and died as a unified group, all the armies joining together against a mutual enemy. If only they had had longer to enjoy their alliances before death had descended upon so many of them.

And then she knew. There was a heaviness in her heart, and she didn't need to seek out proof. But her feet began moving without her command, and her keen elf eyes scanned the bodies before her...looking for one.

She walked for what seemed like a long time, moving slow and silently, beginning to feel like she may not be able to find him, and a part of her didn't want to, because she knew. She heard a cough off in the distance, and though it could've come from anyone she was drawn to it, because there was something about it she recognized.

She picked her way carefully through the bodies strewn over the ground, not making eye contact with the wounded she passed, trying to be respectful of the dead she stepped over. She couldn't stop, or even think of helping anyone until she found him. But her instincts had been right, there he was...Kili.

He was staring up into the sky, and he was clutching something in his uplifted hand. It was his rune stone no doubt, his promise to his mother, a promise he could not keep. Though it was due to Thorin's recklessness and greed that he would not be returning to her, not his own doing.

She dropped to her knees beside him and took in the sight of his ghastly wound, and she gasped, which drew his attention from the sky above. He smiled at her, and she felt her heart thump in her chest desperately.

"There you are, I was looking for you." Kili said with a weak smile as he nodded up toward the sky. Tauriel smiled sadly, and tears filled her eyes. She couldn't recall the last time she had cried, and she reached up and wiped the tears away hurriedly.

Her eyes were drawn to his wound again and she winced, she looked back to his handsome face, and he gave her a mischievous grin and winked. He was so pale, his dark hair and eyes making him seem even more so.

She put one of her hands over his, the one clutched around the stone. "I can't save you this time." She whispered brokenly, her voice was so thick with grief she didn't recognize it, and the tears came flooding into her eyes again. She turned and tried to hide them from him.

Kili reached up and took a strand of her firy red hair and tugged it twice, she turned and looked down at him. He smiled bravely and nonchalantly tossed his rune stone in the air, as he had in the cell in Mirkwood, it seemed like such a long time ago. The black rune stone tumbled in the air and then he caught it again, just barely. He was growing weaker by the moment. 

"I lost consciousness shortly after...the pain was so intense I couldn't help but black out. As I lost consciousness I honestly didn't think I'd wake up. And when I did...and I saw..." Kili said and gestured to his brother, who Tauriel only now noticed. Fili was laying a few feet away, on his stomach, his head turned to his brother and his blue eyes staring in Kili's direction, his arm laying on the ground stretched out toward Kili too, reaching for his brother, even in death.

Tears rolled down Tauriel's cheeks freely as she looked at Fili. 

"When I woke up I wondered why I had been allowed to wake up and suffer more. But now I know why...I have to say goodbye..." Kili said, he brushed his knuckles against her knee, and she looked at him, her vision blurred by her tears.

"Would you make sure my mother gets this?" Kili asked, holding his closed hand out toward her. Tauriel held her hand out and he dropped the polished rune stone into her hand, then his arm fell to the dirt. He was trembling, going into shock from blood loss probably. But she knew he was beyond pain now, and though she was feeling the worst pain she had ever known, in her heart, she was thankful he wasn't suffering. She was thankful for these last moments, thankful that he was lucid and could speak, see and hear her.

She sniffed, and ran a thumb over the stone, and forced a small smile as she looked at his face again. "Of course I will." She managed to say without sobbing.

"Tell her I tried to keep my promise...I almost did." He whispered, looking sad. He gazed into the sky again for a long moment, and she became afraid that he was gone, she was about to say his name when he blinked and looked back at her.

"Send me off with a kiss." He whispered in a fading voice. .She nodded and scooted closer, then leaned down over him, she saw the tears in his eyes, and she pressed her trembling lips to his, for their first...and last kiss. He made a sound that reminded her of a cat's purr, and that made the corner of her mouth jerk up in a momentary bit of a smile. Then he exhaled, and she pulled her lips from his. His eyes were closed, but his smile was bright. He grew a shade paler, and his hand, which had found hers as their lips touched, went limp in her grasp.

"Kili..." She said hopelessly, her voice sounding small and faraway, she knew he was gone. She laid his hand down gently at his side and leaned over him again, looking at his serene face, all traces of pain, sadness, and fear gone, leaving just his smile to remember him by. She reached up and caressed his face, her tears dropping onto him as they spilled off of her cheeks.

"I love you..." She managed to say in a tear filled voice, then she collapsed, her head resting on his still chest.

"He loved you too." A husky voice said, startled she sat up and looked over her shoulder. It was the dwarf with the goofy hat, Bofur. His face was lined with grief as he looked upon Fili and Kili, but when he brought his eyes to meet hers he tugged the corner of his mouth up into a sad smile.

"What you two had...it was brief, and it was unusual...but it was true."Bofur said sadly, tears reflecting in his own eyes.

After a long moment of silence and mourning passed between them, he shifted uneasily on his feet and said, "Well, I best go tell Thorin I found the lads, and it's...as we feared."

Anger flared within her and her back went rigid, "Thorin still lives?" She asked, a bit of her anger seeping into her voice. That man's selfish lust for gold is what had brought this war about, it wasn't right that he still lived when they did not. They had joined him out of loyalty, in a war that only occurred because of Thorin's greed, they died because of his madness. She knew that the family bonds were sacred to Dwarves, they may well have seen Thorin's madness, but they still would have felt it their duty to fight for him...their Uncle...their King.

Bofur nodded grimly, "Yes, he lives...for awhile longer." Then he turned and meandered slowly, and down heartedly threw the maze of bodies. Tauriel turned back to Kili, and beyond him his brother. There mother was alone now, from what Kili had told her in his prison cell back in Mirkwood, they were all she had left, aside from her brother Thorin. They were her pride and joy, and now they were lost, what would become of her? She looked upon the brothers and wanted to say something, She wanted whatever forces would be gaining the company of their souls to know how loved and special they were to those they left behind, but she didn't know anything about the Dwarves beliefs about the afterlife, and no words  
would come.

Instead action took over, she took Kili's arms, and crossed them over his chest. She did this slowly and carefully, reverently. When she had finished she bent low and placed her lips against his brow tenderly. Finally she forced herself to pull away from him, tears streaming freely down her face, she turned to Fili. She didn't know him well, he had always been quiet the few times she had been around him. She recalled his defiance when the Elves had descended on the Dwarves and he was being stripped of all of his many, many weapons. She remembered how he had stayed close to his brother protectively, and kept a watchful eye on her as she had healed Kili. And the selfless way he had thrown himself at the orcs when they broke into Bard's house and tried to attack Bard's daughters. He hadn't had weapons, but he launched himself at the enemy fearlessly, to protect the children. He was obviously brave, and protective. He had a noble bearing, and he would've someday been King of Erebor. Such a grand and promising future, and it had been taken from him, and why? Because Thorin was so stingy he couldn't part with even a nugget of gold, so he let his family and friends risk their lives for his vanity and selfishness. That he breathed a moment longer than either of his nephews was a sin, Tauriel thought.

She rolled Fili over gently, so he was face up, his blue eyes staring up into the sky now. She took hold of his boots and carefully drug him to lay by his brother, and she crossed his arms over his chest as well. She looked at the brothers, and then bent over Fili and said softly, "Where ever you both are, keep an eye on him...keep him out of trouble...for your mother...for me."

Then she looked him over, for some token she could take and present to Thorin. She settled on a dagger still in it's sheath. She pulled it free and saw that it bore his royal emblem on it, just as did the beads in his hair, and his armor.

Tauriel stood and looked down on both brothers. Had they said goodbye to one another before death took Fili and unconsciousness claimed Kili? Had they spoke of worry for their mother, now that they weren't going to be there? Had they wondered what it was they had started out fighting for? Did they regret getting involved in fighting for their Uncle's gold lust? She let herself have one more bout of tears, then she dried herself and strode off in the direction Bofur had went, toward the Lonely Mountain. When she got to the gates she didn't wait to be admitted, she wouldn't explain herself. The great gates were open, what with people coming and going, bringing wounded in and going to seek more. She searched for a face she knew, someone who would give her the answer she sought. Finally she saw one of the Dwarves who had been in Thorin's company. She approached the bereft dwarf, his white hair and beard askew. he was looking at all the wounded that lay on pallets on the floor everywhere.

Balin looked up as Tauriel stepped in front of him, he looked up at her with weary and sad eyes. "Ah, lass...what was it all for?" He asked with a sad sigh.

Tauriel looked around, taking in the sight of all the wounded dwarves too and she answered, "The goal was achieved, Erebor is in Dwarf hands again."

Balin nodded slow and sadly, "I'd give up all the gold in the Mountain if we could have back the lives that have been lost...or will be." And she knew he was thinking of Thorin, and his nephews. She almost said angrily '**_If only Thorin had valued life as much as gold!_**' But Balin's troubles were deep enough, he knew Thorin's weaknesses helped bring them to these losses, and she judged he felt guilty for his blind loyalty. If people had refused to back Thorin in his battle to keep his gold, perhaps this wouldn't have happened.

Of course, had the elves, dwarves, and humans not all been here for battle than when the army of orcs and goblins descended upon Erebor things would have been more tragic. Kili's face flashed in her mind, his pale lifeless face with that grin stretched across it...how could anything be more tragic than loosing him?

She asked Balin to take her to Thorin, explaining she had something for him. If Balin wondered at her motives he did not show it, she felt he was too deep in grief to do much more than just function.

Thorin was laid out on a large bed, in a huge chamber. He looked ridiculously small in the enormous bed. Did Thorin like everything in excess? Several somber looking dwarves were gathered around their dying King, who still wore his bulky crown. He shifted his head towards her when he sensed her approach, the simple movement seemed tough for him, the weight of the crown bearing down on his failing form must have made the effort much more difficult.

"I brought you these." She declared, looking down on him with an angry gaze. His eyes moved from her face to her hands, and he grew even sadder looking. She held out to him the Rune Stone Kili had given her, and Fili's dagger.

"I know you have probably heard of their fate. I doubt you will get to look on them again, I thought you may like a token of theirs, to hold, so you can reflect on what you've done...what you have destroyed." She said, her voice trembling with anger and sadness. Dwalin moved to interrupt and defend his King, but Thorin shook his head and motioned for Dwalin to stop.

Thorin reached out and with a weak hand took his heir's dagger, as he reached for the rune stone she drew her hand back a bit, Thorin paused and looked up at her.

"Kili wished me to return it to his mother." She explained softly, Thorin nodded slightly.

"Then you should." He said, he looked at the dagger, his fingers tracing the details of the hilt. Then he looked up at her again, "You are right, my last moments will be spent in reflection and regret." Thorin whispered gruffly, and she could see the regret pooling in his eyes. She felt remorse for her anger at him...for the hate she had felt toward him as the life left Kili. He was suffering too...he was going to die, and he knew that his nephews, and many other dwarves, died for his foolish greed. Could she look so coldly upon this dying man, who was obviously suffering for his mistakes? Was not Thranduil just as pompous and vain as Thorin? He had been willing to go to war over a small box full of jewels, all because of a long ago offense...the dwarves offering those treasures to him and then withdrawing them as he reached for them.

Only the humans had a true claim to any of the treasure, as it was Thorin, and his company's fault that Smaug was awoken and destroyed a good portion of Lake Town, they did deserve compensation. It was ironic really, humans were thought by many to be the inferior race, consumed by greed and self interest, but in this situation they were the least like that.

Tauriel found herself unexpectedly kneeling before Thorin, she reached out and took his hand.

"Despite everything, as terrible and tragic as it is...you set out to reclaim your homeland for you people, and you have. You will be remembered as the King who got Erebor back for it's true people." She said gently. He looked at her bewilderedly, she squeezed his hand and then stood, releasing his hand. He gave her a nod and soft smile, she inclined her head to him and withdrew. As she left she heard Thorin ask after Bilbo, the Hobbit who had accompanied Thorin's hobbit who had dared to thieve from a dragon, and steal the Arkenstone from the King to give to his enemies as a bargaining chip. One of the dwarves hurried past Tauriel and retrieved a grim looking Bilbo and began ushering him toward Thorin's chambers as Tauriel was emerging.

She stepped in front of the Hobbit, lost in his own thoughts of the possibility of being yelled at again by Thorin Bilbo almost collided with her. He stopped just short of her and stepped to the side, he looked up at her and bobbed a nervous bow and said, "Sorry, excuse me please."

"Halfling..." She said, and Bilbo looked up at her questioningly. She smiled down at him and said, "You have had words with a dragon...he will be no issue. He can't breathe fire."

Bilbo scrunched his face up and said timidly, "I wouldn't be so sure of that." Tauriel smiled a bit and nodded, then turned and went on her way, Rune Stone in hand, though she felt as if there were a heavy black stone in her heart.

As she strode down the grand stone hall she wondered how she was going to break the terrible news to Kili's mother. She squeezed the rune stone in her hand tightly and heard Kili's voice inside her mind saying, "If any but a dwarf reads the runes on the stone, they will be forever cursed." She pondered that conversation and wondered...was she cursed?


End file.
